Dating do’s and don’ts:

Dating Dos and Don'ts

Dating do’s:

1.   Do be open to meeting men wherever you are

Men are everywhere, keep your eyes open and stop missing great opportunities to interact and flirt with awesome guys. As a single woman, you want to take advantage because great, good looking guys are everywhere and often you meet a guy when you least expect it. Remember, you never know, and it only takes one. 

2.   Do avoid relationship limbo 

I see this all the time- we’re together, we’re not together, we might be together…?? It’s a bad, uneasy feeling not knowing what your status is. Regardless of whether you’re simply dating or whether you’re exclusive, it’s important to know where you stand and make sure you’re on the same page. If a guy is playing hot and cold with you, toying with you constantly, one minute he seems into you and the next minute he seems completely disinterested- he’s not for you. 

If you have the relationship talk with a guy and he shy’s away from the conversation or the idea of committing to you, he either isn’t ready or he doesn’t like you. We will talk much more in depth about commitment in a later module. 

3.   Do communicate your wants and needs  

Always be up front and clear as you communicate your wants and needs to a guy, he deserves to know. Once he knows, you’ll then know whether he is capable and able to give you what you want and need. If you aren’t vocal and clear about your wants and needs, you won’t get your needs met and you won’t know if he can truly make you happy. 

4.   Do assume he’s interested in you 

Assume that any guy you’re interested in is into you until or unless he says otherwise. Don’t let self-sabotage do the speaking for you. You are a beautiful, interesting, amazing woman and having the confidence to assume that other people see that too, will do wonders for you. Just like in business people say to assume the sale before selling, assume the guy is into you before getting involved with him. 

5.   Do go after what you want

Always go after what you want. If you see something that catches your eye, piques your interest or has you feeling some kind of way, life is short, you need to pursue it. Sometimes we feel and even wish that things would just happen for us but sometimes we need to give fate a little push, empower yourself and make it happen on your own. If you don’t go after what you want, you will live with regrets and what ifs, living life like that is not what we want. 

Dating don’ts: 

1.   Don’t come on too strong 

Sometimes when we really like someone and catch feelings quickly, we can come on a bit too strong. We want a boyfriend, he’s a great guy, you’re excited, he gives you all the feels, so you want more and more of it.  It can be a bit intense for him if you’re trying to hit the fast forward button, just enjoy it. It’s great if you feel a lot for you a guy but pace yourself as much as possible and wait for the time you spend together to catch up with your feelings and don’t be so caught up more on the idea of him than what’s actually there and you don’t miss any actual traits and quirks of his that are important for you to see both good and bad. 

2.   Don’t make assumptions 

Assumptions can get us into trouble. Because it’s easier than ever to meet new people, we find our patience and tolerance to be extremely limited where sometimes we cut the cord on guys a little too quickly. When we judge people and assume certain things about them, we can screw ourselves and appear close minded. If you have an inkling about someone, ask questions to confirm your thoughts- sometimes you will be right and sometimes you won’t. I wouldn’t want you to wrongly assume something about someone and discount them, when they could have been a great match for you. Get all the facts and then decide what you want to do. 

3.   Don’t always go out with a group of women to meet men  

When you’re out with a group of women, most men aren’t going to approach you. They’re intimidated enough approaching one woman, approaching several women often feels nearly impossible. The idea of getting rejected by one woman is a lot for a guy, the idea of getting rejected by multiple women is a complete nightmare. Usually one of two things happen…They either ask a friend to do them a solid and be a wingman keeping your friends occupied or he won’t approach you at all. Most men have no idea how to approach multiple women so to make things harder for him will make things harder on you. Go out with your friends and have fun but also create space to be by yourself at times so he’s more likely to approach you. 

4.   Don’t waste your time dating guys who you know aren’t right for you 

I wasted some prime dating years dating guys who never deserved more than 5 minutes of my time. We stay in relationships that we shouldn’t for a lot of reasons- a lack of worthiness, comfort, not wanting to be alone, fear of what other people would think or say, pressure from others, the list goes on and then we look back and regret it. Remember that every minute you are spending with someone who isn’t suitable for you are minutes taken away from someone else who could help change your life. We live once and we don’t get time back. We want to be really careful who we spend our time with. At any point whether it be the second date or the second year of dating, if you don’t feel that this guy is right for you, listen to your instincts and end things. You are far better off being alone than with someone who you don’t have a potential solid future with. 

5.   Don’t make decisions for anyone but yourself 

A lot of us make decisions for what we think other people want us to do and not what we truly want to do, which never works out well.  Sometimes our friends and our family can put pressure on us and set expectations, which aren’t fair or realistic for us, and we end up making decisions for them and not for us. This is your life and we don’t have time to be living our lives for other people. You deserve to make the best decisions for yourself making your own choices and setting your own standards. 

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