We don’t get into relationships hoping it doesn’t work out. Being in a relationship affords you the opportunity to decide whether someone could be a great fit for you long term. The problem is when things turn south, we don’t always recognize what those signs are, they’re not always so glaringly obvious.
Sometimes these signs are easy to identify and recognize but danger can appear when we ignore, gloss over or just completely miss the subtle reminders that show up in our relationship that it needs to end.
Because we ignore those signs and subtle reminders, which often recognized from our instincts, we end up in bad relationships.
Not only do we end up in bad relationships but we stay for much longer than we should, often years longer. In turn, this creates more pain and damage when the relationship does ultimately end for both people.
In order to avoid this, you must have a very clear understanding of what those hidden signs are. When you begin a new relationship, you will be able to see these signs pop up which will allow to end the relationship much earlier to save time and spare heartbreak on both sides.
Below are 5 signs that are not so obvious that signify you’re in a bad relationships.
- You keep yourself abnormally busy
We all get into a fairly set routine day to day, regardless of how busy we find ourselves. When you start filling up your calendar with all sorts of things that don’t include your significant other, this is an excuse to create distance between you two. You justify this avoidance by claiming you’re suddenly so busy yet you’re the one making yourself so busy.
- You’ve lost your identity
When you begin to lose who you are as well as your personal voice, a piece of you dies. The parts of you which make you unique and empowered has been traded in for a lesser version of you causing you to rob yourself and the people you’re close with of who you truly are. You’ll become unhappy, withdrawn and possibly resentful of your partner. You look in the mirror but you don’t recognize yourself anymore.
- You begin to change who you are
You begin to change who you are to make someone else happy. You try desperately to fit the mold of what this person wants and expects of you. This doesn’t work long term, it’s exhausting to always play a role you weren’t supposed to star in.
- You don’t light up
When we see our friends and family mention their significant others, it says a lot about their relationship and how he/she feels about their partner by the way they look and what they say. If you don’t appear happy and generally positive talking about your partner, it’s not right.
- You get into jabbing matches
If you two take every opportunity to jab at each other to get under each other’s skin, if you’re often feeling defensive or you just don’t see eye to eye and you’re attempt at resolving it is to jab your partner or vice versa you’re headed for disaster.
How many stab wounds do you want to subject yourself to on a daily or weekly basis? You may not be getting into full blown fights so it doesn’t seem as serious but these constant jabs will cause pain, distance and resentment in your relationship.
If any of these signs seem to parallel your relationship, it’s best to speak to your partner about the concerns you have. If your partner is not receptive to your feelings and wanting to improve the relationship, it’s time to end the relationship and move on. If your relationship isn’t bringing you joy, comfort and fun, you’re not in a healthy relationship.